Monday, September 03, 2007

"North Carolina, come on and raise up..."

"...Take your shirt off, and wave in the air just like a helicopter"
- Petey Pablo

For those that don't recognize the lyrics, don't worry, the song wasn't that good, and Petey was a one-hit wonder. Anyways .... I'm back! My one week off was quite the relaxing retreat, and I feel recharged. Our accommodations came courtesy of Cathy's uncle, who owns a beautiful beachfront condo on Emerald Isle. We were kissing the Atlantic Ocean. Our typical day consisted of eating, sleeping, swimming, and shopping. Done.

Highlights of the trip:
  • Wal-Mart! We must have made 4 trips to the Supercenter in Jacksonville, and I came out buying something every time! What is it about a US Wal-Mart that makes it so damn attractive? I found Arnold Schwarzenneger movies in the $5 bin. Total Recall, The Running Man, and even T2! And I bought Chappelle's show season 2. I'm Rick James Bitch!
  • We stuck Cathy's cousin in a shopping cart, padded the cart with pillows, gave her a bike helmet, and then proceeded to smash stuff all around the store. Displays, other carts, it was great.
  • I took a picture on my phone of a sign just outside one of the shopping malls. "No Weapons Allowed"
  • There was so much propoganda it made me sick. There were highway billboards with American flags and the message, "In God we Trust. United We Stand." It wasn't advertising for the army. It wasn't a presidential slogan. It was just a sign on the highway. I saw American flags for sale at Wal-Mart. I saw a bumper sticker on a car that read, "Not a single southern state voted for Kerry." The lady swimming at the pool had a floating bed with an American flag pattern. Two of them.
  • We had no net access, and I had to resort to walking around the condo with my laptop fishing for a wireless connection, so I could check for new notifications on Facebook. Yes, I am pathetic.
  • I saw dolphins
  • My wife's cousin got so drunk, he fell on the toilet and split his face open in two spots. I, also being drunk, slept through all the hoopla and only found out in the morning.
Thanks to my wife's family. It was fun! Let's do it again next year!


chinwhat said...

can i go next time? i want to "meet" Malory

Shaun said...

Team ID will be there!